How Sweet the Sound (microfiction)
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Something moved in the shadows. It loosened itself from the mud where it had lain buried for sixty years. Rising, it swirled, taking form. From its center, a fiddle’s tune sprang forth, leaping and dancing like a candle flame.
In the rocking chair, the old woman smiled, tapped her foot, and hummed along.
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Hmm, this makes me wonder whether the old woman summoned the music, or if it is seeking her out. The image in the first paragraph is so vivid - I can definitely picture and even hear it. I feel like it's missing something to connect the music with the woman.
ReplyDeleteThis feels like it could be the start of something interesting! I wasn't sure, though, if the form was a person/being or an instrument. And it was a bit jarring to me that the form came out of the mud, but then the old woman is in "the" chair, like she's in the same space (though I guess she could be on the porch... or just somewhere within earshot...). I liked that it didn't end as a horror/scary story :) I'm always a little resistant to prompts that sound like they're meant to be horror/thriller.
ReplyDeleteI wondered if the creature emerging from the mud had a history with the woman. So many possibilities! I wonder what this would do as flash fiction.
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